Today in obvious statements: Orgasms are pretty great! But why is it that some just feel particularly intense? And are there known ways to make your orgasms even better? It turns out there are, according to experts.
Which factors affect the intensity?
The intensity of a male orgasm can be amplified by many factors, such as lower stress levels, your sense of comfort and emotional safety with your partner or even the environment in which sex is taking place. Mental stimulation (mood, attraction, erotic thoughts) and physical fitness (cardiovascular health, muscular strength, endurance) also influence the intensity of male orgasms.When you keep resorting to the same sexual routines—both with and without a partner—your orgasms can start to feel the same as well.
Orgasms that are the most memorable are often the ones that disrupt that sameness—that break the patterns we've developed over time or that come attached to new experiences.
Looking to take your orgasms from mediocre to mind-blowing? We talked to sex experts and evaluated the latest research to recommend the best ways to strengthen the male orgasm. Here are simple strategies to try, whether you're masturbating or getting down with a partner.
1) Touch your taint.
If you haven’t already been introduced, meet your taint—or your perineum, if we’re getting technical. It’s the strip of skin between your balls and your butt, and it’s one of many highly erogenous zones that responds well to sexual stimulation. This area is packed with nerve-endings, so it feels really sensitive.
Some guys say that by applying pressure to this area, they’re able to have multiple orgasms—which is probably because you can stimulate your prostate gland externally via your perineum. During intercourse or oral sex, ask your partner to place a finger here and press onto it until the pressure feels just right.
2) Massage your P-spot (a.k.a. the prostate).
Speaking of the prostate, it turns out this gland is the male equivalent to the G-spot. You can stimulate it externally by applying pressure to your perineum, but if you’re interested in maximizing pleasure, you’ll have to do a little anal probing.
If you're playing with a partner, have them lube up the soft pad of a finger and stick it about 2 inches inside your butt. Once they feel the small, walnut-sized lump, they can apply some pressure and light thrusting.
One option for a mind-blowing orgasmic experience is to combine prostate and penile stimulation. Another option is to focus entirely on the prostate and have a P-spot orgasm, which many people describe as a deeper, fuller-body sensation.
3) Try for multiple orgasms (penile and prostate).
Thanks to that pesky refractory period, it's tough to have more than one ejaculatory orgasm in a row. But with enough practice, you might be able to have non-ejaculatory multiple orgasms, also known as NEMOs.
The key is squeezing your pubococcygeal muscle (it should feel like stopping a pee midstream) right at the brink of climax, until you learn to separate the feeling of orgasm from the experience of ejaculation. Deep breathing can also help you lean into those feel-good sensations without blowing your load.
You can’t expect for each small orgasm to feel like your usual orgasms.They’ll be less in intensity, but for some men, having several small orgasms is actually preferable to having one big one. The easiest way to cum multiple times is to throw some prostate orgasms into the mix, since the recovery time is shorter.
4) Do kegels.
You know how women do kegel exercises and say it strengthens their vaginal orgasm? Men can do the same. Essentially, kegel exercises are a way of contracting the muscles of the pelvic floor, which give you greater control and intensity during sex. Try lifting your penis up and down with your muscles, or even try to “write the alphabet with the tip of your penis.
5) Use a sex toy.
We're used to sex toys being marketed toward women, but there are plenty of toys out there to help penis owners get off, too. Did you know there are also vibrators designed specifically for the penis? The WeBrator is an innovative, multifunctional sex toy with over 12 possible uses, including using it as a cock ring or as a prostate vibrator.
For people with penises, vibrating toys can add extra stimulation to the glans, the frenulum, the perineum, or can be used in the butt. While anal play may not be for everyone, you may find that having a sex toy in or around this area during orgasm can kick your pleasure up a notch.
6) Have an orgasm-friendly lifestyle.
Getting in shape will help every facet of your sex life, and what makes for better orgasms are the same thing that makes for better health generally. For example, high blood pressure is linked to problems with ejaculation and reduced sexual desire.
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Start with greens. Spinach helps dilate blood vessels, which can increase blood flow to the genitals. Other greens like kale, cabbage, and bok choy are good sources of folate, which helps reproductive health.
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Next, make sure you're eating eggs. They're rich in B vitamins, which ease stress and are important for a healthy libido, which means better orgasms.
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Oats and whole grains are one of the few natural ways to boost testosterone in your bloodstream. More testosterone equals stronger orgasms.
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Finally, don’t forget to stay hydrated. Drinking plenty of water promotes blood flow to the penis, while also ensuring you have enough energy to last in bed.
As for what to avoid in your diet - limit processed foods, added sugar, alcohol, sodium, and caffeine. Before your next romp, try some testosterone-boosting activities like going for a run, biking, or swimming. Other things you can do to support testosterone production include getting enough sleep, finding ways to minimize or relieve stress, and ditching the vape.
7) Try edging.
Physically, an orgasm may be more satisfying if there has been a long buildup—it’s so gratifying to finally get that release. A study in the Journal of Sex Research advocated “edging,” or the practice of purposefully delaying orgasm for a more intense climax. The study showed that if people paused when they were about 90 percent of the way to climax, and then resumed after slowing down a bit, their eventual orgasm was way more powerful.
It’s an easy way to amp up your game: Bring yourself to the “edge” of your orgasm, slow down, and take a pause. Take a deep breath here before resuming sexual activity. Try to do this two or three times before letting yourself finish. You can experiment with edging while masturbating before testing it out with a partner.
One of the best aspects of edging is that it can force one to become more connected to their own pleasure, to their own body, and to the signals that their bodies make.
8) Stroke your sack.
Just before you ejaculate, your testicles rise up near your body to give more power to your ejaculation. If you press gently upward on the testicles just before ejaculation, it’s likely to be very arousing. Ask your partner to place the palm of their hand upward on your balls, moving them a little closer to your body. It’ll heighten your arousal and increase the intensity of your orgasm.
9) Just breathe.
This comes from tantric sex, where you’re supposed to move the stroke with your breath. Zero in on your breath, and try to slow it down until it’s in tune with your thrusts. When you’re just about to come, you’ll notice your heart rate and breathing naturally start to speed up—but keeping it slower will improve the amount of oxygen and blood flow that reaches your genitals, making your climax even stronger.
10) Introduce some nipple play.
Male nipples have loads of nerve endings, but unfortunately, they are often overlooked due to social stigma. In fact, a study in The Journal of Sexual Medicine found that nipple stimulation is arousing for 52% of men—yet only 17% of men have had their nipples played with during sex. When you incorporate other erogenous zones—like the nipples—you add a separate nerve pathway to your sexual stimulation. The upshot, called a blended orgasm, can be extra-strong because more nerve endings participated in its creation.
Not sure where to start? ask your partner to lube up their fingers and then caress or pinch your nipples during a blow-job for an extra explosive combination of sensations.
11) Try sensory deprivation.
Sex is a feast for the senses—but what happens when you take some of that away? Sensory deprivation can be as simple as using a blindfold, turning off the lights, putting on some headphones, or wearing earplugs. When you limit some of your senses, it tends to turn up the volume on the others—like touch. In other words, when you can’t see or hear anything, you’ll feel everything even more.
Sensory deprivation can also help you to be more present in your body, and make it easier to get carried away in those titillating fantasies.
12) Focus on the frenulum.
Quick anatomy lesson: The frenulum is a small V-shaped band of tissue located on the underside of the penis, which connects the head to the shaft. While it may be small, the frenulum is immensely sensitive—and sexually responsive. Since there are a ton of nerve endings in such a small area, stimulating it can lead to some pretty memorable orgasms.
The frenulum is a kind of pleasure center for the penis, alongside its neighbor, the glans. It is most responsive to light touch and play, and to vibrations—and the mouth can also be used to stimulate this area.
As for how to achieve a frenulum orgasm, you can ask your partner to gently flick their tongue or rub their lips across the area. You can also do the job yourself—using your fingers to stroke the frenulum up and down, sideways, or in a circular motion. Reaching orgasm through frenulum stimulation may take more time than through more traditional thrusting or base-to-head stroking, but your patience can come with a massive payoff: deeper, more powerful orgasms.